Two movies with such disparate themes as Fanboys and Bride Wars end up--upon viewing--to have one crucial thing in common: They both suck.
Seriously. Ever wonder why Fanboys languished on the Weinstein Brothers' shelf for close to two years? It sucks. The story of a group of rabid Star Wars fans who take their sick buddy cross country to try and steal a peek at the yet-to-be-released Episode I: The Phantom Menace has absolutely nothing going for it, not even the often-winsome Kristin Bell as the sole fangirl. The premise is all wrong: Anyone who's actually seen Phantom Menace knows it's not worthy of any such holy quest. But it's the script that bogs this movie down, down, down. Don't even bother.
I will fully admit that I can channel my feminine side and enjoy a good chick flick every now and again, especially one that features hot actresses with guns, guns, and more guns. With a title like Bride Wars, I expected the very hot Anne Hathaway to show off some of the action chops she displayed in Get Smart, and with that W-A-R-S in the title, perhaps even bigger guns, like bazookas and flame throwers. I knew the plot: two childhood friends have their dream weddings scheduled for the same day at the Plaza Hotel. I thought for sure this would involve all-out mayhem, action-galore, as the two battled it out in the Plaza, perhaps ending with the hotel being totally destroyed.
What a disappointment when I found out there were no guns involved. Not even one.
Oh, there's a little tussle at the end between Hathaway and co-star Kate Hudson (who, quite frankly, looks a bit too long in the tooth to be Anne's childhood friend and definitely plays the villain in this piece), but no shootin', no cussin', no "fire in the hole!" This film would have been so much better with guns. It should be a Hollywood law that any movie that has the word "wars" in it should have guns. Lots and lots of guns.
Comments