Innocent Bystander

CBS 8 News in San Diego totally sells-out...film at 11.

In a bold move some (like the always greedy Fox 6 News) may loudly proclaim "GENIUS!" Channel 8 (AKA KFMB-TV or CBS 8 News) in San Diego has discovered a valuable piece of advertising real estate right there on your TV screen. The station, evidently so desperate for money it'll slap your logo up for the duration of its newscast, has staked out the crawl barrier at the bottom left of the screen as ad space. Most news stations, in an effort to present as much info as possible--for better or worse--during their newscasts, have utilized lower third information "crawls" for years now. Channel 8 has added a little barrier on both their standard and HD formats that allows the text to slide behind a box as it makes its way off-screen. On that little blue box they've added ad space, and there sits the logo for TOYOTA EL CAJON.

Does it work? Damn straight it does! I'm writing about it right now. But I'm writing about it for a totally different reason. Yep, it's obnoxious, and as usual with a TV station when the sales department persuades the news department "THIS IS A GOOD THING FOR US," it isn't. What happens when the lead story is a high-speed chase on the I-5 and the car they're chasing is a Toyota?

But Channel 8 has clearly latched onto something here, and I'd like to suggest they go a step or two further. First off, you have all that additional space in HD. Slap company logos around the giant screen behind the anchors! Secondly, adopt NASCAR-style jumpsuits for all on-air talent. Sure, this will only work from about the mid-chest up, but start small, then work into a set that has the anchors standing. I'd love to see a nice STP oval on Barbara-Lee's chest, or a big SUNOCO on Stan Miller's shoulder. And the weather guy? Every time he turns around, TARGET and the familiar red circle logo. ON. HIS. BACK. It's perfect ad placement.

Here's the lesson all news directors and station managers forget: News should be separate and distinct from the sales department. The minute you slap a sales-generated logo on your newscast--and keep it up there for 60 whole minutes--you abdicate all autonomy. You've reduced what should be a sacred trust between you and your viewers to a really chintzy dollar amount. Make no mistake about it: EVERY TV station is a business, but news should remain above that concept. That logo space reserved for a sales client represents one and only one thing: your news is for sale and exists solely as an advertising vehicle to make money for your station. How am I as a viewer supposed to trust you to be fair and impartial in your news coverage?

Coming this fall: The San Diego wildfires brought to you by Toyota El Cajon!

PS--The logo was missing from their 6:30pm broadcast, making this probably either a show-by-show sponsorship deal, or a bold new experiment to see if anyone would actually notice.

We are in a fight.

Proving--once again--that I have way too much time on my hands.

Readership falls off; blogger becomes alarmed...

Recently, I've noticed a falling-off of my daily viewers here. Perhaps some of you are sensing my general ennui in both blogging and life in general, the latter a tedious exercise in existence that I find myself repeating day after day. Okay. Things aren't THAT bad, but they could be better. I could make them better. I'm just too busy to try. Napping takes a lot out of me. It makes me want a nap.

I have racked my brain about what is happening and can't really come up with any concrete reason for the (admittedly minor) exodus other than perhaps I have overstayed my welcome at the blogging piggy trough and it's time to maybe find a new thing to write about. I have steadfastly ceased blogging about my "personal" personal life (i.e. dating and such), since basically it's non-existent. Oh there's the minor flirtations: the wildly creative--and tall--woman who I bantered with back and forth for close to two months, until we both realized we had met once before, circa 2001, on another dating site and didn't like each other. All my female friends who heard this story thought it was WONDERFUL. "You found each other again! It was meant to be!" they assured me. Nope. The fact that she was 5'9" didn't help, of course. We all like to think we're egalitarian and height is a quality only shallow people fret over, but it's true. I dated someone who was 5'10" once. It was like hugging an adult. (In retrospect, that line makes me sound like a "Crimestoppers Manhunt" waiting to happen...what I mean is, I'm still a big kid, I've never grown up, and I prefer people closer to me in stature and weight to be intimate with. Oh, forget it.)

Perhaps I should dream up some fictional story, some Mexican soap opera to entertain you with, a saga in which I woo the beautiful Latino super-model Dondé Esta, who turns out to be milking me for money for videogames for her real boyfriend, Paco, a member of the Medellin drug cartel, doing hard time in a prison in Guadlajara. He plots revenge from behind bars while I am swept along by the exciting super-model life of Dondé (accent grave required; she also has one over her upper lip). Eventually, after urging on my part to seek out the things that make her happiest, Dondé goes back to being a busboy (who knew?) at El Torita, while Paco puts a pipe bomb in my Honda (something that sounds a lot dirtier than suspenseful, I admit).

But that story doesn't exist, in reality or my mind, so I won't go there. I don't know why you're not visiting as much. It's a mystery. I think the whole blogging thing is cyclical. I know i get tired of reading the same old crap every day. Maybe you'll come back. Maybe you won't. Maybe you're not even reading this now.

Avengers Assemble!

Proving I will never grow up, I have fallen madly in love with these new figures from Hasbro. They're called Marvel Mighty Muggs, and while I flirted with the Star Wars series (I bought Darth Vader, but none of the others), it was love at first sight for these guys. Since I don't want to waste ALL my money (just some) on them, I've decided to limit my purchases to the original Avengers, which is these four guys, and hopefully a Giant Man/Wasp combo that they'll do (maybe, maybe not). The only one eluding me at this point is Thor, which I don't think is available yet.

The ironic thing is I would have steered clear of these as a kid; they're just too chunky and unrealistic. These days they fall under the figure sub-genre of "urban vinyl toys" (something that definitely did NOT exist back in my toy-buying days), making them so cool, they're probably out of my league (because well, I'm not even cool enough to live where I do, according to SOME people).

There's probably something radically wrong with me if I get so hyper-kinetic over a bunch of toys. Discuss amongst yourself.

PS--There's an Indiana Jones one, too!

Dateline NBC: The Comic Book Murder...

Network programs such as Dateline NBC, 20/20, and 48 Hours Mystery are often difficult to watch. Because of the murder mystery format some of them have adopted almost full-time now, the shows' various reporters are covering sensationalistic and tabloid-like subject matter. Dateline and 20/20 each have a group of pompous, over-wrought, holier-than-thou reporters who push the stories they cover even further over the top. But all that pales when you're watching one of these shows and you know the person they're covering.

Last night's Dateline NBC was about Michael George, the comic book shop owner from Windber, PA, who is also the owner/manager of the Pittsburgh Comicon. I've known Michael--purely as an acquaintance--for about 15 years now, and I was shocked to hear he was arrested in the unsolved murder of his wife, Barbara, who was killed back in 1990. The two owned and operated a comics shop in Michigan at that point in time. No one was ever arrested for the crime--which looked like a robbery gone wrong, and included the execution-style murder of Barbara George--until last year, when a "cold case" unit reopened the case and arrested George, solely on circumstantial evidence. (The weapon used in the murder was never found.) George was found guilty and awaits sentencing, and there's still a possibility the whole thing will be thrown out. The defense asserts the prosecution didn't prove their case--even though the jury obviously thought otherwise--and the judge in the case had some doubts himself. At the very least, it'll be appealed at some point.

It's not up to me to decide whether or not Michael George did it. The rather surreal thing about this was watching Dateline last night, a program about a murder trial involving someone I know (however slightly). Thankfully, the least histrionic reporter NBC has on the show, Dennis Murphy, covered the story. But it was marred by the producer's choice to do "comic book style" graphics (or what passes for what a news producer and graphic designer THINK are comic book style graphics), and the glee of the son of the police chief, who--like everyone else in the piece--seems to have KNOWN George did it back in 1990. Why he wasn't arrested and prosecuted then would seem to be the real mystery. Actually not so much--the local police force screwed it up, ignoring a crucial interview that places George at the comics shop at the time of the murder (he answered the phone and talked to a regular customer at a time when he was supposedly on his mother's couch sleeping). That gleeful son of the chief, who is now one of the top law enforcement guys in the county and went on and on during the show about how he was winning one for his "old man?" He really did the job his dad should have done in the first place. That's what makes his glee so disturbing. He was making up for his father's incompetence.

I was pretty detached through the whole thing, until they showed the courtroom video of the verdict. George lost it at that point, crying wildly for two whole minutes after the guilty verdict was read. It was then that it hit me: I KNOW this guy. I know him, and I'm watching him in this totally unguarded, anguished moment. When they brought him up to hear the the judge, they had to carry him to the podium. It was painful to watch--far more painful to endure, I'm sure. Testimony said he never cried for his dead wife. Well, he cried when he realized he was going to prison for killing her.

The most disturbing part of the program, though, was the thing that network TV does best (or worst, depending on your point of view): the sheer amount of commercial breaks. I think there were THREE in the first 20 minutes alone. Dateline: NBC: The Comic Book Murder was 2 hours long, with commercials. I think it was actually about 72 minutes long, content-wise.

I found myself wondering, though, if Dateline picked this particular case entirely because of the comic book angle. The Georges could have owned a bait shop, or a Dairy Queen. Comics only fit into the story because George claimed some $30,000 worth of rare books were stolen. But comics are hot right now. They continue to be--finally--assimilated more and more into mainstream pop culture. There isn't a year that goes by without multiple comic book movies (Iron Man last week, The Incredible Hulk in June, and Batman returns in The Dark Knight in July). Was the comic book motif the hook for the producers? The sleaze factor of the show was definitely amped up by the garish graphics. And when it comes to television news programs these days, it's not so much the story you tell, but HOW you tell it.

Friday Foto #26

New York State of Mind #1.

To see more of my photos--Friday or otherwise--please click here!

Satellite radio sucks, too...

I have often lamented the state of modern day radio, especially here in San Diego. Recently, on my trip to Pittsburgh, I had a rental car which had satellite radio in it. I won't mention which of the two services (it was XM), but I kept the dial turned to a station they called "Flight 26" pretty much the entire time.

And I was shocked to hear the same damn songs pretty much each and every day.

Yeah, the same problem I have with local radio evidently recurs on a satellite basis, too. Now before you all get up under my grille about Howard Stern and everyone else who talks on a daily basis as part of the satellite radio revolution, let me gently remind you that I hate talk radio. Even the fairly innocuous local personalities like Jeff and Jer and Monique and the Man...I hate them. I'd rather (again) use knitting needles as Q-tips. No one should be forced to be funny at any time, but especially not between the hours of 6 and 10 am.

The only advantage I can see to satellite radio, as it pertains to radio personalities like Stern, is that the way I understand it (and correct me if I'm wrong), is that they are required to actually broadcast from Outer Space. Stern, Artie (if he's still on the show), and Robin, thankfully, are all living on a satellite orbiting the Earth. I understand, also, that they can't come back until their contract expires, so that's a good thing.

But I digress. "Flight 26," as it's called, was supposed to be playing the hits of the 90s and today. Which they did. Except it seemed like a really small playlist of hits, like maybe 25 songs or less. I didn't listen a lot, but I listened each time I was in the car, and it seemed to me I was hearing the same songs over 5 days. Maybe the iPod has spoiled me, with its ability to play exactly what I want when I want to hear it. I guess I'm my own DJ these days.

But I have no plans to blast off to Outer Space anytime soon.

Wednesday is new comics day!

Let's take a look-see at what we've been reading the last few weeks, shall we?

IDW's continuation of The Complete Chester Gould Dick Tracy is in its brand-new fourth volume, this one covering from mid-1936 to early 1938. It's not Gould's finest hour, but it's compulsively readable and foreshadows something major on the horizon: the cartoonist's macabre villains which took center stage during the 1940s. This volume contains an extended story with the Purple Cross Gang, a small group of criminals (one's a hunchback--you gotta love a hunchback!) so named because of the purple crosses tattooed on their tongues. But the most important storyline is that of The Blank, the first of Gould's villains to be something beyond just a thug or mobster. The Blank is just that: a man with no face. He's really Frank Redrum (that's murder spelled backwards, which Gould is kind enough to tell us, in case we're not normally backwards-spellers), a mob boss who gets part of his face shot off and then goes after the old gang who rejected him. It sets the stage for the coming tide of weird, strange, wonderful bad guys (and a few girls) that Gould will bombard his rapt readers with in the coming years. Another volume or two, and this series will shift into the best years of Gould's work, from about 1940-1960.

Kirby Five-Oh! is TwoMorrow Publishing's 50th issue of their Jack Kirby Collector. It's more of a book than a magazine, and for this issue editor John Morrow pulled out all the stops and produced a tabloid-sized trade paperback (at $19.95) instead of the usual tabloid-sized magazine. It's a great companion piece to Mark Evanier's Kirby: King of Comics. The 50 tie-in is tenuous at best; besides celebrating the magazine's 50th issue (who knew?), there's Kirby's 50 best covers, 50 best character designs, 50 best stories, etc. It's a lot of 50s, but it works. The only (slight) drawback is minimal color, but it's wonderful to see so much Kirby art in black and white and pencil form, a hallmark of TJKC on a regular basis. If you love Kirby, this one is for you.

Iron Man: Beneath the Armor is a movie tie-in book, but it's about the many comics series of the metal man, not a behind the scenes look at the movie. Written by Andy Mangels, this is actually a very cool book, and I find myself wishing someone would have published similar books on Spider-Man, X-Men, and the Fantastic Four when they made the jump from printed comics page to the big screen. Perhaps a tad too comprehensive, the book runs through Iron Man from his conception to the present day, with tons of art, interesting and consistent design--it's a great looking book--and interviews with the creators, writers, and artists.

The mainstream comics artist Stuart Immonen almost has a "secret identity." His self-published work is more like that of an indy comics artist than the guy known for his superhero work (currently on Ultimate Spider-Man). His beautiful first sketchbook, Centifolia, is now available from his website (click here to order). I don't buy a lot of artists' sketchbooks; there are so many these days, it almost seems like it's more important to have a sketchbook to some artists than it is to actually work in the comics industry, but this is beautiful. I also picked up two of Immonen's other self-published books, the wry and wonderful 50 Reasons to Stop Sketching at Conventions, and the tiny but full color Never As Bad As You Think. I've been a fan of Immonen's art since his great work with Kurt Busiek on Superman: Secret Identity, a very different mini-series that DC published a few years back. This almost--ALMOST--makes me want to check out his current work, but since it's on Ultimate Spider-Man, ultimately, I'll pass. But I will keep an eye on his website for future self-published efforts.

My big fat summer movie preview (July + August)...

Continuing from here...

July 2
Hancock...Will Smith used to own July 4, but I'm wondering how many people realize this is a superhero movie and not one about the grandiose signer of the Declaration of Independence. (It's okay...the original title--Tonight, He Comes--had a WHOLE different double meaning.)

July 11
Hellboy II: The Golden Army...Yes, please. I'd like a little Hellboy with my summer movies, sir.

July 18
The Dark Knight...The bloom is already off the rose on this one, with the tragic death of Heath Ledger. Truth be told, I'm not sure I buy Ledger as the Joker, or Aaron Eckhart as Two Face. Neither are actors I've enjoyed in anything else. Still, if this is half as good as the first one, it'll be great.

Mama Mia...I'd rather use knitting needles as Q-tips than listen to ABBA, but every time I see the preview for this, it looks like they're having so much fun, I want to join them. Not sing or dance, mind you, but watch.

July 25
Step-Brothers...Oooo...pinch me! Another Will Ferrell/Adam McKay comedy where they just show up and ad-lib all day and a camera films them? Thanks, I'll pass. Maybe next time they can actually do it the old-fashioned way and write a script first? By the way, this is the third Judd Apatow produced comedy this year.

The X-Files: I Want to Believe...Never watched the show. Saw the first movie and thought, "WTF?!" But this one does look cool, especially from the quick 90-second teaser they showed at WonderCon.

August 1
The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor...I'm not sure we need another Mummy movie, but I might see this just for Shitz and Grinz, who I believe play henchmen #1 and 2.

August 8
Pineapple Express...The FOURTH Judd Apatow produced comedy this year. He's the Martha Stewart of comedy films. Let's put him in jail.

August 15
Tropic Thunder...Amazingly enough, NOT the fifth Judd Apatow produced comedy this year, but it sure seems like one he'd do.

August 22
Bangkok Dangerous...What's a summer movie season without an action flick with Nic Cage? Yeah, the word "bliss" comes to mind pretty quickly.

August 29
Babylon AD...Remember Vin Diesel? Me neither.

Summer's over. Go home, kids.

My big fat summer movie preview (May + June)...

Iron Man certainly jump-started the summer movie season, didn't it? While the official weekend take is now a little south of $100 million, it's still gold-plated. There's a lot of movies coming out this summer, even though May 2 is hardly the start of the sunny season (even by San Diego standards). For better or worse, here's what I'm looking forward to--and even better, NOT looking forward to in sumer movies.

May 2
Iron Man--read my full review here.

Made of Honor--I think it's cute that Patrick Dempsey got his own little 27 Dresses film, except it would have probably done better if he had to wear all 27 of them. You couldn't pay me enough money to see this, either in the theater or on DVD. Coming soon: Sandra Oh in 27 Maids of Honor, Ellen Pompeo in Maid of Horror, and Isaiah Washington in I Would Have Had My Own Stupid Wedding Movie If I Learned to Keep My Big Mouth Shut.

May 9
Speed Racer--watching the previews of this convinces me it would make me puke.

What Happens In Vegas--wait...the increasingly skanky-looking Cameron Diaz AND the vapid and useless Ashton Kutcher in the SAME film?! Plus the way beyond not ready for prime time Dennis Miller as the judge? WOW! Pinch me...it's summer at the Hell Megaplex.

May 16
The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian--I didn't see the first one. I'm not going to see the second one until I see the first one. I may never see the first one, so chances are I'll never see the second one. And don't get me started on the third one.

May 22
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull--You can not begin to comprehend how happy I get when the preview for this comes on in the motion-pitcher theater. It's like an old friend has come to visit. I can't wait to see this.

May 30
Sex and the City: The Movie--I'm going to the country this weekend.

June 6
Kung Fu Panda--Jack Black as a panda. Who knows kung fu. And more than likely smokes weed, is very short, and looks like a homeless person in person. Yeah. I'll pass.

You Don't Mess With the Zohan--Adam Sandler, the luckiest man on earth, in another laugh riot, along with Rob "I wouldn't have a career if it wasn't for Adam Sandler, but he makes me disguise myself in every one of his films, I wonder why" Schneider. That panda is starting to look better and better.

June 13
The Happening--Do we really need still another M. Night Sha-ma-na-ma-lan movie about some strange incident? I think not. And when this film was made back in 1967, it was groovy, baby, a real love-in. Dig? I'm guessing in the new version, people watch the old version and spontaneously combust.

The Incredible Hulk--Immediate extra points for the presence of Edward Norton, promptly pissed away by the crappy CGI special effects that look like a green-painted, steroided-out Roger Clemens looking for Mindy McCready in a really cheap videogame.

June 20
The Love Guru--Mike Myers with a foreign accent in funny clothes with lots of bad puns? I've seen this movie. I've seen this movie three f*cking times. Enough, already.

Get Smart--I have a sneaking suspicion I've already seen every funny bit in the film in the previews, but Steve Carell and Anne Hathaway make me want to go see it anyway. Extra points to Hathaway for adding that "e" onto Ann. It's hot.

June 27
Wall•E--It's by Pixar. I'll see it. I'd watch them animate the Yellow Pages with John Ratzenberger reading it. Seriously.

Wanted--Mediocre graphic novel (story-wise, but great art by JG Jones) made into big budget movie with Queen Angelina but with all the superhero tropes judiciously removed. Eh. I THINK I'll see it. I dunno.

Come back tomorrow for July and August. If you think this stuff is tiresome to read, try writing it.